Found this true

Some periods of our growth are so confusing that we don’t even recognize that growth is happening. We may feel hostile or angry or weepy and hysterical, or we may feel depressed. It would never occur to us, unless we stumbled on a book or a person who explained to us, that we were in fact in the process of change, of actually becoming larger, spiritually, than we were before. 

Whenever we grow, we tend to feel it, as a young seed must feel the weight and inertia of the earth as it seeks to break out of its shell on its way to becoming a plant. Often the feeling is anything but pleasant. But what is most unpleasant is the not knowing what is happening.

Those long periods when something inside ourselves seems to be waiting, holding its breath, unsure about what the next step should be, eventually become the periods we wait for, for it is in those periods that we realize that we are being prepared for the next phase of our life and that, in all probability, a new level of the personality is about to be revealed. - Alice Walker

Friday the 13th/ The Wallet which I lost/ The Emotions

The title of the post might sound a bit confusing but what to do when the writer has multitude of thoughts in her head. When the thoughts are multiple and one tries to structure them - that is how a post comes up. I am trying to relate all the titles of the post together so that I can give a sequence to my thoughts which are popping out from all directions. I am feeling a little restless from some days - may be that is normal for most of us or may be my brain is functioning more than normal these days. ;) Most of time this weekend I have felt sorry for myself. Not because I had a fight with someone (which I am never good at), not because I hurt someone but I feel extremely sorry for loosing something very dear to me.

They say one should never feel self pity because it leads to depression. And I do believe that depression is the result of negative focus. One of the cause of depression is getting emotionally trapped to something dear - be it tangible or intangible asset.If one is bonded emotionally to something and looses it -the person can be in a great state of misery, great state of depression.

Friday the 13th is considered as not so good day -  I am not sure what story is associated to it. I am a non believer of such things but this Friday the 13th (Sept 2013) really made me rethink my belief. My 10 year old wallet was lost in an auto .It had all my precious belongings (mind it- its not about the money, or the credit/debit cards which I am talking about) - its about various others things which were present in my wallet for which when I think again and again I feel bad/depressed. They say money can buy everything but what about the emotions attached to things, to people. I personally think no one can buy them." They are precious."

The wallet - (the gift from my dad) was not only something where I stored my money and cards. It was a store house of memories , store house of many unforgettable moments which will never come back. I might sound like a fool but it really was one of the biggest assets of my life. I am not blaming anyone for my precious loss. Neither the auto wala nor God. Its my own mistake which I will remember for years from now and may be each time I get down from the auto I will make sure I do not leave my belongings in it - neither in the form of cash nor my in the form of my faded memories. Lesson learnt for whole life.

That was something NEW which Friday - The 13th taught me. - emotions and precious memories to be taken care of in a safer way. Does that answer your question dear friend? :)

Doorways - Dodinskey

Taken @ Banaras

“Your existence has many doors, and each serves a purpose that ultimately helps define who you are. “